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I have had a thought in mind for many years, like

A wish of sorts
I have read about rural health care
About natives
About slaves
About European ways
About the continents of
Asia and Africa
I like local
Like i help local
Not really into going
To Haiti as a white woman
From USA
People do as they do
This is my scope

I hated my new workplace for awhile
When you have been elsewhere for a couple
Few decades
It comes with the territory
I don’t like for profit health
And have never worked in it
I am not sure about it
It’s what it is right now for me
It’s about the people mostly
Like i get to
Go out to far rural places
And really help people
Where there are total lacks
Of services
And rural areas are totally
In need of services for a
Long time
And my colleagues are some of my best teachers
Right now

So now i am confused between
Going with the discomfort of
Working for “the man”
And having my way with my daily
That informs my activism
Peoples welfare and health
And my growth
I don’t know

Full moon soon
Big reflection



So extra

I like that my kids are raising
Their male kid
As not so extra
And it had been said by them
Like dudes think they
Are extra since day one
And they are instructed in it
By society and culture
Like everything they do
Is so fantastic
Get a grip
I work in a field
That if people valued
Would be considered extra
As well as teachers
Child care people
House cleaners
But B ball players
Cult leaders
Money makers
Tech bros
Blah blah blah
Consider themselves extra
Yeah well
You not extra
In that sense
You are extra arrogant
And I have no time for that
Times up


There is a disparity in hospice and right to die

It’s really apparent to me
Like some people get murdered
And others have natural deaths
It’s not like people
Are pristine
And have a natural death
In purity there are so many myths
About natural death
And then there is the right to die
I am good with whatever in this
I don’t know where to start
When people don’t even get a choice
This philosophy seems
Rendered inoperable
I mean in the streets
In Starbucks
And with lawyers guns and money
No one gets consequences
The facade is no more


Why I don’t like a lot of people

Flibbidy jibbit
Cosmetic craptacular
Air heads
Concerned with stuff
Concerned with getting somewhere
Sex crazy
All about the appearances
Not real
Not engaged
Don’t know real time
Is reality a thing they say
Let’s be spiritual and bypass the reality that is
Transcendent is dependent on
Your “god”
The show
Sorry folks
Show is over
Nothing to see here.


Can I trust you

Probably not
It’s common among
Some and other don’t care
It seems in my field now
I am not a white man who gets implicit trust from his fool friends
I am trusting my intuition
My experience
And going with this
On my own
With supports
That I cultivate
I totally get women who don’t trust in
My realm
I do what I can to support trust
In the end
I really don’t support
Male fools
And patriotic
No he
Is not
A nice guy
As the dudes say

In peace


Ok I do like to be chaotic in my time
Not your time
Boundaries babies
It’s alotta mirrors of chaos externally now
And it is what it is
Structural political
Genderal personal
And more
Foundations are crumbling in patriarchy
And it is uncomfortable
For some not informed
I slready did the crumbling
On all levels
Many have a way to go
I have to live in the chaos
But I have big boundaries
No xanax needed


Why is toxic masculinity a norm

Not just in media
Where it is VERY pronounced these days
But in everyday
I know the type for sure
But its now megawatted
Perhaps due to media
But perhaps its reached its crescendo
As in enough is enough
Yet young and old continue
To kill on many levels
And its like
Whateva in terms of response
I for one am outraged right now
This level i have never seen
And cowards continue to cow
And say nothing
I will not stay silent
And will do what i do
There are the wounded
Who wound and there
Are the wounded who heal
Tools matter
And the only tools that i use
Are in terms of creativity
Not destruction
Yet i have to live in it
Less than many
And more than a lot

Game over dude