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that is just the way it is

March 27, 2015

I cant count the number of times I have heard this statement.  It is far too many than I care to acknowledge.

the most recent is writing to a male owner of a massage therapy school I attended.  I wrote, initially to connect about my concerns about boundaries in massage and my poor instruction about this initially.   the person asked me to write more about my experience and so it did. I made suggestions.  I was a massage therapist and I do receive massage on a regular basis and have for a long time.  I have explored going to different people and places as is my practice. I want to know what is out there. the response to my writing, was pathetic. it was like most, when I choose to relate my experience. I was told that this is just the way it is in healthcare and that the teaching was better now. he suggested that because of my experience as a writer, I ought to write articles to address this.

this, to me, is throwing what I said, back at me. he never addressed what I wrote. this is my experience with men, when I really choose to tell them about my experiences, they say its better (yeah they would know),  they throw it back at me, like, its my problem.

well, it is NOT MY PROBLEM, it is yours. and maybe you don’t see that. and maybe you are still making $$$ at what you do regardless of addressing the issues of domestic violence, rape and sexual assault. and maybe you just don’t give a rip about trauma informed care. (all this I wrote about)

this is your problem and not mine. I refuse to respond to people anymore, who don’t even listen to what I speak of.

on the flip side, I do know people who understand what I speak of and truly listen. these are the people I am engaging with now days.

not wasting my breath anymore on people who are clueless and really don’t give a rip.




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