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getting lost

May 17, 2015

today I was on my way to a friends baby shower in a town, not far, that I have been to quite a few times over the years since she moved there.  I got lost. I never have before.  I don’t know it happened,  precisely, but it did.

maybe I missed the turn because I did not see the sign,  maybe I was distracted and missed the sign or maybe the sign was removed. nevertheless I got lost and knew I was going the wrong way at some point.

I was late. my reaction was to text my friend, be honest and tell her that I was going to be late. and try and back track and find my way again.

I could have been angry at myself for getting lost. I could have gotten anxious because I was going to be late and i could have made an excuse, or  I could have just given up and gone back home.  I could have….  all these could haves at one time were, because I have done all of them at one time or another. I think that these were learned responses from my past. now that I know people who are accepting of me and of the way the world can be chaotic, I feel more free to let go of those old responses.

I was grateful to notice that I have changed in the way I handle myself when I get lost. I have gotten better at getting lost. I can say the way I handle myself now is a lot less stressful because I am not reacting to the situation, I am problem solving for a solution. this is a flow that affects how i react to everything really, but i do have some moments where i fall back. i think that getting lost today, was a way for me to notice how i have changed. noticing a lot these days.

peace

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